The first thing I want to say for the record is that the smoke alarm did not go off. Whether because it wasn’t working or because of my quick-thinking leap to open all the doors and windows, I’m not sure. But I want you to know it did not go off.  I count this as a point in my favor.

So here’s how it all started. I was shopping for some snacks to fuel a marathon writing project when I came upon sweet potato chips. I had had these before and they were yummy and tempting and certainly healthier than some of the other snacks beckoning to me. But I thought the price was a bit steep. Suddenly I got one of my flashes of brilliance. They come upon me now and again. I could make my own chips for a fraction of the price. All I needed was a couple of sweet potatoes or yams and a bit of oil and salt. What could be simpler?

In retrospect I’d say buying the chips would have been a whole lot simpler. Anyway, I got home, sliced the yams, sprinkled them with a little salt, tossed them on an oiled tray, and into the oven they went. There they stayed for what turned out to be a bit too long.

Immersed in my project, I slowly became aware of the unmistakable smell of something forgotten in the oven. When I finally rescued them, half the batch was burnt to a crisp. The last thing I want to say for the record is that the other half was pretty good.

 

We join spokes together in a wheel,
but it is the center hole
that makes the wagon move.
We shape clay into a pot,
but it is the emptiness inside
that holds whatever we want.
We hammer wood for a house, but it is the inner space
that makes it livable.
We work with being,
but non-being is what we use.


A short poem this week which offers much food for thought. It is ascribed to Lao Tsu, a Taoist sage, from the Tao Te Ching, translated by Stephen Mitchell.

Five tips for getting going and keeping going


Why
Why do you want to write a memoir? Many people write their memoir as a legacy for their children and grandchildren.  Others write about their life, or a segment of it, because they think their story may be an inspiration to others. Think about why you are thinking of writing.

Tip #1
Hold the image before you of your grandchildren reading this, or of someone facing challenges being strengthened by knowing your story.

Where
Where do I begin? That’s what most people wonder. If this is your life story for your descendants, it may start at your birth or before. Key to the story may be your grandfather’s journey here from the Azores. Your story may start on the boat that brought him here, or the village that was too small for him. However, you don’t have to start your writing project at the beginning.

Tip #2
Start with the part that’s bursting out of you, demanding to be told. The
rest will shape itself around that.

What
What to include? Absolutely every event in your life? The fifth grade
report card you recently found in your mother’s attic? The memory of your
first date? The moment you proposed to your sweetie, now your wife of 45
years? Your pride in serving in the Marines or marching on Washington?

Tip #3
Don’t edit too early. Put it all down. There will be time later to edit
out parts you’d rather not go down in history.

When
When am I going to do all this writing? You may be asking yourself that as
you survey your packed calendar and endless “to do” list. Look at your
week and see if there’s some little spot that can be carved out for
writing. Is there a TV show you can give up? A time you relax at a coffee
shop with the newspaper? Maybe your laptop can take the place of the
newspaper once a week.

Tip #4
Pick a time and put it on the calendar. In ink. Treat it as an
appointment. Keep the appointment.

Who
If you’re having difficulty keeping this appointment with yourself, you
may find it helpful to enlist a friend to act as an accountability
partner. The most helpful partner will be someone who is also working on a
project. You can meet at the coffee shop every Sunday morning. Your friend
can have her project in tow and you can have yours. Knowing she’s waiting
for you will spur you to get out the door and, once you’re at the coffee
shop, to actually work on your memoir. You will feel foolish just sitting
there with your friend deep in her work. And what about being an
inspiration for her?

Tip #5
Enlist a partner to help you stay on track.

If this still seems like a daunting project and you need a little or a lot
of help launching your memoir writing project, keeping it going, or
finishing it, call me for a free 30-minute consultation to explore whether
I can be of help to you.

A Very Wet Santa

Letitia Hanke-Ryzhkov, owner of ARS Roofing, used this whimsical poem I wrote for her in her 2012 Christmas card to her clients. She got dozens of responses—her clients loved it. It was the first time in her 16 years in the roofing business that clients had raced to comment on her card. Letitia, just so you know, is the dynamite entrepreneur who learned the roofing business up on the roof with an old pro and started her own successful roofing business serving Sonoma and Marin Counties. Learn more about her and her company at www.arsroofing.com.



‘Twas the night before Christmas and as in years before,

Guests were sleeping on sofas and mats and the floor.

Uncle Bob, on the sofa, was noisily snoring,

With such a houseful, you knew it wouldn’t be boring.

The rain coming down beat a soft little tune,

A very wet Santa would be coming by soon.

Suddenly Uncle Bob sat up with a shout,

‘Who splashed me?”, he cried. “What’s that all about?”

Alas and alack, the roof had begun to leak,

The outlook for Christmas morning seemed bleak.

But hark! What hear we, far in the distance?

ARS Roofing has come to our assistance!

Oh, joy! Jubilation! Merriment and beer,

They fix the roof and depart with a cheer.

Amazing! Unbelievable! Stupendous, we say.

There’s no doubt ARS has saved Christmas Day.




Wait, you say, it’s not Christmas, it’s Thanksgiving! Yes, yes, it’s true,
 but we have to think ahead.
    Call me now to get a custom-written verse like this in front of your
clients by Christmas.

DAYS, DAYS, and MORE DAYS

Today is 11-12-13. Think about it. It’s the only time in this century that we’ll have that exact configuration in a date. Thinking about days and dates, I looked up what official Days we have in November. It’s a full calendar. November 4th was Waiting for the Barbarians Day. Hope you had a fitting celebration. Did locks, chains, and window bars sell briskly that day?

November 1st, on a happier note, was Book Lovers Day. And today, the 12th, is National Young Readers Day. Mark your calendars. November 15th will be Clean Your Refrigerator Day. Be prepared. November 15th does double duty as I Love to Write Day. Oh, and think ahead: Warn your kids that May 10th will be Clean Up Your Room Day. Seriously.

Other interesting and important days I discovered while researching this topic: Absurdity Day, Beautiful Day, and Take a Hike Day; Backwards Day, Magic Day, and No Socks Day. While creating a true National Day requires an act of Congress, other Days are simply declared by companies and special interest groups.

We also have months, or rather, Months. November is both National Novel Writing Month AND National Pomegranate Month. With all these celebrations going on, it’s a wonder any work gets done. Not to mention planning for future Days, such as March 14th. Yes, on March 14th at 1:59, we celebrate pi. Not pie, but pi. Pi Day is the unofficial international holiday celebrating the mathematical constant pi. The value of pi is approximately equal to 3.14159…, hence March 14th at 1:59.

Looking ahead to December, we have Letter Writing Day on the 7th. In fact, the whole month is Write a Friend Month. We’ll all be ready for National Chocolate Covered Anything Day on the 16th. And I’m eagerly anticipating Look on the Bright Side Day on December 21st.

And in a calendar quirk that hasn’t happened since 1888 and won’t happen again for eons, Thanksgiving and the first day of Chanukkah coincide this year. Have a Happy Thanksgivukkah!

1. First clause doesn’t match second clause

Oh, no, not that seventh grade grammar language! I thought I left that behind in Mrs. Morell’s class! Well, yes, many people did. Here’s an example:

“When you use my services, they’ll really help you.”

What’s wrong with that sentence, other than the fact that it’s boring and colorless? The subject is “you.” The second part of the sentence must be about “you,” too. Example:

“When you use my services, you’ll find they transform your life.” Here, the “you” at the beginning matches the “you” at the end.

A more complex example: “By using integrated system techniques, the components build on each other.” Wait a minute. Who is using integrated techniques? Maybe you, maybe I, but definitely not “the components.” Say instead, “By using integrated system techniques, we make sure the components build on each other.”

2. Decorative apostrophes

An apostrophe indicates the possessive form. The cat’s paws. The priest’s robes. An apostrophe should never appear between a word and the pluralizing “s.” It’s NOT the cat’s whisker’s or the priest’s vestment’s.

3. What about it’s and its?

Ah, yes. It’s and its. They keep proofreaders in work so we’re not complaining. But here’s the secret: It’s means it is. That’s all it ever means. Its means belonging to it. So test out your sentence. If you can substitute it is for it’s, you’ve got it right. If not, you don’t.

4. Sally and I? Sally and me?

Which is it? Depends. Sally and I went to the workshop together. The workshop leader gave Sally and me some handouts. Got it? Here’s how to test the second sentence, the one that trips people up: When you take out “Sally and,” does the sentence still work? The workshop leader gave me some handouts? Yes. The workshop leader gave I some handouts? No.

5. Who or whom?

Don’t read this if you’re of the opinion that whom will be gone from the English language 50 years from now. On second thought, do read it.  You want to be correct for the next 50 years, right?

Who wrote this? She did.

Whom should I ask? Ask him.

Who is speaking to me? She is.

To whom am I speaking? To him.

The clue to the correct question is in the answer. If the answer is he or she, put who in the question. If the answer is him or her, use whom. Without any fancy grammar talk about subjective case and objective case, that’s an easy test you can use. Just for the next 50 years, though.

Setting: On a writing retreat to Sausalito last summer.

I’m sitting on the deck of a houseboat overlooking the water. A gaggle of geese swims by. I can see two egrets in the shallows, stepping daintily, picking delicacies from the mud with long, slim beaks.

I’ve got my favorite mug in my hand. It’s an elephant head, and the handle is the trunk. In it is a delicious fruit smoothie. I had planned to sip it slowly, savoring each sip as I wrote. Instead, I’m munching on it. The blender here doesn’t seem to work so well. It leaves big chunks of fruit unsmoothed.

No matter. The weather is perfect, the view sublime. I don’t mind chewing my smoothie thoughtfully as I write my very first blog entries. This is going to be the summer I actually launch my blog. (See The Reluctant Blogger.)

Earlier, I walked along the various docks, admiring the quirky and unusual houseboats. One looks like a pirate ship. Another is a San Francisco Victorian. A third is a Mississippi riverboat. Here’s one with a large sea serpent (possibly a small dragon) slithering charmingly along its roof.

It’s a setting made for inspiring creative juices to flow. Two houseboats down, a guy is playing his guitar on the dock. It’s a friendly community, and people stop to chat, pet each other’s dogs, and trade news. The resident who recently moved to a nursing home after 35 years on this dock. When they’re finally going to be done refinishing the parking lot. How to get rid of raccoons that lodge under your boat. 

The photos below show where this blog was born.

You’d think creating blog content would be easy pie for a writer. And it is. Other people’s blog content. Why has it taken me so long to create my own? I think it’s related to the cobbler’s children going barefoot.

My new motto: IJWS. It’s Just Writing, Stupid.

For two years now, friends and advisors have been telling me I must blog. “It’ll be so easy for you. You already write every day.” Right. Easy. For one year I’ve been planning to blog, saying I’m going to blog, jotting down ideas, even writing other people’s blog entries. And where has my blog been all this time? Ah, yes. Lovely day, isn’t it?

So it is cause for celebration that I’ve finally unveiled Madhouse Wordsmiths, the blog of my business, Finishing Touches Editing. I invite all my readers to share stories, offer constructive feedback, and tell me what you’d like to see in this blog.